Recovering TM Cult Children --

Given that most posts here generate stimulating conversation about the TMO, Maharishi and cult (and recovery) dynamics, I couldn't help but note the lack of comments (both here and on TM-Free's FB page) to a recent insightful post Maharishi Mahesh Demeans Children. which quoted Helena Olson's "Maharishi at 433" about the guru's attitude toward children. This post was shared anonymously by one our readers who was raised in the TM Movement and included a number of revelatory remarks about adult TM-children's view of the Movement.

The lack of commentators' response to the words of a TM-kid who is finding their voice to publicly speak the unspeakable (criticism of the guru) reminds me when I was the only born-and-raised person in a cult recovery therapy group. Someone else in that group (a former cult member) looked at me askew and said, "That's really interesting. I never thought about the children in our cult."

I laughed and shook my head, "That's the point." I responded, "Children were left largely to their own devices. The leaders did not think about children.  Parents followed leaders' dictates, leadership bent upon narcissistic and financial goals. Cult members with follower-mentality lacked guidance on how to parent. There was some variation, and mostly a lot of neglect."

Sadly, little attention is placed, even in cult recovery, upon the larger issues of those born-and-raised in TM and other cults. The programming from birth can be hard to overcome. Some have lifelong effects that interfere with professional, social and family development. Into adulthood, many remain dependent primarily upon their cult-based childhood friendships because they are unable to create bonds with outsiders.

When leaving the group, "kids" lack any history of a non-cult life from which to navigate the outside world.

Just noticing... still little-to-no recognition for those whose parents and community had 'more-noble' priorities.

Fortunately, an informal network of TM-kids helps one another, in cities around the world. They (we) have our own stories. Most TM-kids share their stories quietly between trusted friends. They do not speak out publicly to avoid rejection from family and lifelong friends, many of whom remain in degrees of TM mentality.

For TM'ers who may respond saying "Maharishi said that your children are your program."
I guarantee that Maharishi NEVER said that. In 1979,  I was a 21 year old single mother, with a 2 year old child from a relationship that had begun as statutory rape when I was 15 years old.

My parents had left me at MIU Santa Barbara to attend the local high school, without a legal custodian when I was 15 years old. They thought it was a pure, safe environment (variation of a common experience for subsequent decades of TM kids). MIU Prep was a joke at that time - a babysitting service based around a few dirty donated fisher-price toys and volunteer babysitters (including me).

I told Bevan Morris, "Our children are our Program" at the first World Peace Assembly in Amherst Massachusetts, summer 1979.

Bevan Morris had called me to a private audience to threaten banning me if I didn't participate in full Program. He said I would be responsible for World War III and global economic collapse because I continued my self-modified version of Program to allow me to also care for my daughter.

In 1979-mid 1980s I then told other parents, as I had told Bevan, "Our children are our Program. Maharishi doesn't know about children because he doesn't have any." I also said the same when I taught childbirth and early parenting classes to TMers in Fairfield, Iowa through the mid 1980s. It seems that some community remembered the message, although attributing it to their guru.

The stance of Maharishi and his Movement (led primarily by single men) toward children and parenting was "Do your program to support spontaneous right action and glean the support of nature". Meanwhile parents were told to meditate for hours daily and donate ample $ums to Maharishi's vision.

MIU Prep and MSAE (Maharishi School of the Age of Enlightenment) were established by motivated parents, not because of Maharishi's interest in children. When TM leadership learned they could glean publicity through MSAE, there was a smidgen of interest to exploit enlightened children to attract followers. That's the same motivation behind David Lynch Foundation's efforts toward school children.

For the most part, TM children hindered the quest for enlightenment, to be seen and largely ignored. Other than teaching children to meditate and parrot the guru's teachings, the Movement did not support nurturing, protecting nor inspiring children's individuality. Fortunately, a few parents had strong parental / maternal instincts; those homes often became a haven for other kids.

Seems that's still the case. To the TM-kids out there - remember, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!

Maharishi Mahesh Demeans Children

An adult who was raised under Maharishi's supposedly enlightened umbrella shared the following excerpt from one of the founding books about Maharishi and Transcendental Meditation. Do read the comments from other TM-kids which followed this facebook posting.

Kind of long story but interesting for all of us TM'ers, the children seem to be the only ones that can recognize the emperor with no clothes. Excerpted from "Maharishi at '433' By Helena Olson", the 1979 republication of Helena Olson's 1967 "A Hermit In the House", about her family's houseguest experience with our dhoti-clad guru when he came to the United States :

Theresa had not yet seen Maharishi, and as he alighted from the car she started to run toward him. His eyes met hers and both smiled as he commenced a slow, regal walk to our steps. Roland joined us to greet him. Theresa and I presented him the white geraniums.

"Nice," he said.

"Come in," said Roland who escorted him to the sheet draped armchair. He sat in it in the cross legged position. Tina came in to meet him, and, as I expected, talked to him casually and easily as we all wished to do. I enjoyed just looking at him. We offered punch. He declined and asked for water. Tina and Theresa served him. Then we invited him to see the house. The Siamese cats, Su-Ling and Mei-Ling, came with him from the living room into the small library. Turning into the study, he lingered a moment, then proceeded down the hall to view the dining room, saying nothing. He nodded quite often to the little retinue following. We were hoping he liked it. When we came to the stairs, Roland asked Maharishi if he would like to see the room we had prepared for him. He nodded, and we went upstairs. The two cats raced ahead. The front bedroom was large and airy with windows on two sides. Naturally, it was a little on the dainty side, as it had been decorated for our two oldest daughters while they were home. He stood only at the door. As we went down the small hall to point out the bath, he stood silently. Then he said, "What is there?" motioning to a separate wing of the house. "Oh, Maharishi," I laughed, "that is Tina's room." I nodded toward her, and was a little surprised to see a slight frown on her face. "Even we rarely go in there," I started to say. "I see it?" came the reply. I felt trapped. Every large home and family has a room that gets its door closed when company comes. This room was like that most of the time! We felt Tina's need to be free, and we put as little restriction on her as possible. Her room was completely her private kingdom. Only Sun-Ling, Tina's special favorite cat, came and went freely. Although she had spent the morning cleaning her domain, I had great hesitancy in opening the door. She had always said,"I can't relax when things are too neat."

At this fateful moment we stood in front of the closed door anticipating the worst. I caught Tina's eye as she stood there watching adults invade her world. I wanted to leave the door closed but had to take hold of the knob and open it. Tina's life was to change too. I heard a deep gasp come from Maharishi as he stepped back. Every inch of the walls not adorned with doll collections was covered with souvenirs from school proms, menus, pom-poms from ball games, a toreador poster, ballet posters, movie star pictures, a cow bell and other props from the theatre. But the bed was made, and all clothing was put away. Maharishi's eyes took in the whole collection, and came to rest on the four large windows framed with trees and tropical vines. The curtains blowing free in the afternoon breeze gave a well decorated room an air of seclusion and a suggestion of simplicity. "If you would like to stay in here, we can take some things off the walls."

"That would be very nice."

I thought everything was fine until, out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of Tina's face. I shut my eyes quickly and ushered the group downstairs to safer ground. After the family was once again alone, I took Tina in my arms. She was near tears. "If that man is so holy, he understands how I feel about my room! Nobody can have my bedroom! Why can't he use the front bedroom?" Her eyes glowed like fiery coals. "I wish he would have, Tina. But, for some reason, he liked your room. I think it is quite an honor."

Tina was not convinced.

Olson, Helena, Maharishi at '433': The Story of Maharishi Mahesh Yogi's First Visit to the United States (Los Angeles: R. R. Donnelley, 1979). 40-42.

Facebook Comments on the post   :


E what an asshole! 

M Wow Tina got screwed over twice; once by her mom who didn't protect her privacy/property and again by the strange man in white robes.

M Yah, and then didnt Tina go and built a house at HM?

L She did, I met her with her attorney husband can't remember his name? She seemed pretty out of it to me:(.

M Peter and Tina Sterling... I guess Tina had housing karma with Mahesh her whole life! Zoinks! ;-))

L I still have my house in Boone!! Keep hoping someone from the new cult will buy it(sri sri whatever)

P Lol. If Tina didn't want to give up her bedroom then it's because she was just unstressing. An enlightened master never makes mistakes - it was good for her evolution to give up her bedroom. She just wasn't evolved enough to understand.

M Learned you can't help anyone..but they can see your story and learn for themselves ...when they want to wake up, they will on their own timing, but many are way too invested to ever do so.

K There is an old saying "Take the best and leave the rest". I personally know Tina and Peter, and I'm sure she is neither "out of it" or feels deprived from Maharishi choosing her bedroom. But here's the question I have for L and M: Which is more important to you- How Tina feels today, or your opinion about what happened in the story above. If you are acting out of compassion for Tina, then I'm sure she would love to talk with you about the experience (she and Peter do have a telephone). But if you are more interested in trying to find and spread negative stories about Maharishi (or anyone else) then I'm sure you will find an eager audience. Some people are always more interested in dirt.

N HI K ...naw, nothing is "against" or "for"--- I think they are a lovely couple. Just find it interesting that she has housing karma with Mahesh..;-)) First her bedroom gets swiped then she builds a million dollar mansion where Mahesh tells everyone to build, then he pulls out of the development...interesting karma is all! Blessings upon you.

F Yeah sorry K   I'm from Australia and know none of the people involved, but i was raised in the tm movement. Its not a matter of enjoying the act of digging up dirt. I was deprived of many things due to the TM movement, and I never even stood in his presence. It's just a reality. The man was a parasite.

M I know a man here in M--- whose sister was approached sexually by Mahesh years ago, when they were in TM movement in their 20's. She had been falling in love with a guy her age, while Mahesh made his advances. She and her boyfriend decided to leave the TM group and basically "get out." Mahesh offered them a small private place to fly out on when he heard they were leaving. The plane mysteriously crashed minutes after take off.

My ex husband bought Mahesh's old helicopter (during the time we were not in Mahesh's favor.) the helicopter got shipped to Florida from Holland. Our pilot went down to Florida to fly it to NC, and almost died because it had been jimmied with. The only reason he is alive is because he knew from his time in Israel how to land a copter whose tail rotor had fallen off. 

Our breaks on our vehicles in NC were cut when we returned to get our stuff at our homes.

The guru was not benign lets just say.

M I know that the above is a can of worms for the K’s out there, but what the heck, I want to let people know, what L says is true.

K If those stories are true, I'm sorry you guys had those experiences. But it is sadder that you choose to spend so much time re-living them. Go out and live life. And if you are haunted by these experiences, see a therapist. We all have bad experiences. Some worse than others. But life is for living. Where we put our attention is a choice. And what we dwell on. we become. No offense intended.

M K you are absolutely correct. In addition, the beauty of connecting on FB can be to share and swap stories, both beautiful and painful. While most of my life is now swept up in the throws of very different subject matter, it is amazing to look back up my river and see how the waters shaped the rocks. I imagine for L and others who were raised from birth in the movement that the processing and de- programming may last longer than for myself, and I honor and respect this process, as it is a deep awakening into what feels right to the depth of one's soul. And soul matters are of great importance and value, and worthy of deep reflection. Therefore let us all listen and share our perspectives, as you have, such that we may further each others' path toward understanding.

L My reason for sharing is I don't want anyone to live through what I did and to reveal the monsterous lies that are being taught to children and adults alike. The children are more susceptible in some ways as beliefs become almost intractable if swallowed young. Also, very creative and innocent minds can end up in trouble too. Both of those wonderful qualities in people being used against them I find monsterous!! TMO needs a god dam warning label like any powerful drug!!!

M... Gotta say my evidence is not anecdotal -- I lived it. 

I can even give names on the stories of others, but prefer to respect others' privacy.

Bottom line is, I am not a part of any TM bashing group, and actually do not regularly spend my energy in this way, but I see many still are hopping out of the hot water cauldron, and if I can cheer them on, I certainly will..:-))

For those that choose to keep swimming in the hot water, god bless, cause it must still feel good and that's an authentic choice as well.

L’s thread does peak my interest, and while I've held my tongue for a decade or so, I find it quite fun to make fun of my own past and my own gullibility, I totally cannot believe what I believed, I suppose..:-))

Side note: beyond the attempts on our lives and our finances from Mahesh, I'd say the saddest part was hearing Mahesh yell at D  on the phone abusively. That sure the hell is not anecdotal -- I was there listening. No one deserves that, for choosing to have a child and get married. Or being in Vlodrop and experiencing being "excommunicated" in that environment ... That sure the hell isn't anecdotal either. And at the time none of those abuses were even very funny. Just saying'

M yeah ... well anyhow let's all just say, a certain chord has been struck with L's post, cause this is a long thread and probably the most and longest I have ever commented on FB to anyone's anything...love to you all, and now I'd better get back to that thing I call the present most immediate life

F Wow!! I accept that everyone here approaches the subject from a different angle, but I am going to try to nut this out. We're are talking about a powerful group of people with a massive following and it's not just America and India. We're talking about wave after wave of children being born into a non-reality where all sorts of abuses take place, including sexual, physical, spiritual, emotional, ritual and mental abuse. If it weren't for those people who continue to make information available on the internet, whether they repeat themselves or not, I would have never even made contact with another single ex-TMer. The most important thing here is children. And if we were to shift our focus away from a problem which continues to destroy lives before they even begin, that would be highly negligent. And yes K, I see a therapist. Have seen one for more than half of my life. You cant tell a quadraplegic to get up and walk, in the same way you can't tell a survivor of childhood trauma to just move on with life. There are many handicaps.

L Thank you for that wonderful perspective. You left out "At that time he probably wasn't enlightened yet, there are many stories of him reading people's minds, he just couldn't with Tina." My response "He was trying to exert authority and establish who was in control of the house and he was probably pissed she talked with him like he was just a normal dude." LOL 

Thirty Years Later: What was all that about? (Part 8 of a series)

(To read this series from the beginning, start here.)

Helena Olson, observing the reception given to the founder of TM in 1959, made this comment in her memoir of the events of that year, a book originally titled "A Hermit in the House:"

It seemed to bother some people that we were receiving pieces of wisdom from a man from India, since from our viewpoint America was a more progressive country than India.

Here in one sentence is an apparent paradox inherent to the marketing of TM. By the reasoning of "some people," at first glance, TM should have been universally dismissed as useless, as a throwback to a backward land. While some clearly rejected TM based upon its source, many embraced it, in ways that I think reflect America's often complicated relationship with the rest of the world.

"America... a more progressive country" also implies that Americans, secure in some notion of supremacy versus the rest of the planet, can't be conned by foreigners. This notion lies in tension with certain desires, that poverty, unhappiness, stress and other ills will allegedly be remedied by something relatively exotic, in the form of the TM program. These are things that often lie in areas where some feel the West has reached a dead end and has nothing to offer. By this line of thinking, there is no domestic product that addresses these areas - fields that, before encountering the TM program, people often didn't think would have anything to do with paying for meditation instruction packaged as a consumer product.

It's into this realm that the decontextualized pieces of Indian culture presented in the TM movement's programs came into play. The entire movement took on an appearance that was just alien enough to clearly support the assumption that it wasn't from here. TM instructors dressed in formal Western clothing and with otherwise conservative appearance accepted money and performed a ritual that clearly came from somewhere else, in front of an image of a dead Hindu monk, in a language most people here couldn't understand, while being told not to disclose what they've been taught. These collisions are deliberately created, sending a series of messages: "Your Western lifestyle is basically lacking. You will pay us to fill that need. You think all your Western science, medicine and technology still doesn't address those needs, so you'll accept something alien you don't understand on the flimsy promise that it'll eventually satisfy you. Finally, since we know you think you can't be conned, you'll accept our instructions and our non-answers to your questions, otherwise you might suspect that there's a lot less to this program than you think there is, and you wouldn't want to feel foolish about what you're doing and all the money you're spending, would you?"

Over the years the TM movement has evolved, and the Indian cultural aspects of the movement have moved from the background to front-and-center. A standard photo of the movement's founder is now likewise always present on websites and materials. The movement's products have also evolved from simple meditation to astrology, herbs and architecture, clearly identifying them as being of Indian origin. References to the Vedas, a text generally considered to be of Hindu religious or spiritual origin, are recast as "scientific" in a further decontextualization of their original meaning to be successfully sold to a credulous audience.

All of these contemporary aspects of the TM movement reflect an underlying strategy: to frame itself as an external source that supposedly addresses the alleged shortcomings of Western life. It is designed to exude a level of strangeness that enhances its attractiveness, but not so much strangeness as to be completely irrelevant or repulsive.

(Continue to Part 9)