Emotional Problems Post-TM; Relating to Fairfield Relatives, Part II

[This is Part II of the previous article "Emotional Problems Post-TM; Relating to Fairfield Relatives, Part I" - ed.]

Second topic:  How to Relate to Fairfield TM Relatives

Reader's comment:

"I’d like to get back to some previous comment threads on how to relate to family in TM if you are not in it....

'...I don’t expect my [relatives] to give up TM, and I don’t even try to convince them much or argue with them. But I do want to be able to visit them and find things to do (even if by myself or with other family) that are not completely connected to TM or MUM.  I don't mind spending some time at MUM....

'There is certainly a lot of sensitivity to criticism of Maharishi by most I talk to. 

'I’m curious if others have found ways to visit Fairfield and their TM friends and family comfortably, or if it is always uncomfortable for those who are not part of TM any more (or never were).

'...Finally, I’d add that I’m continuing in my reading and effort to see TM as a new religious movement rather than destructive cult, even if some on this site think this misguided or impossible."

My response:

I don't have friends or family in Fairfield, so I won't respond to the first question.  I hope others have some pointers for this reader.  But I will respond to his/her final comment.

My take on it is that the reader is confusing him/herself by trying to compare apples and oranges.  Religions, whether old or new, are in my opinion defined by beliefs and practices.  Destructive cults, on the other hand, are not defined by beliefs and practices, (no matter how unusual the beliefs and practices.)  Rather, destructive cults are defined by the manner in which a person is drawn into and kept in the group.

There are several models to describe this process.  One of my favorites is this simple model:  A groups is a destructive cult if outsiders are: (1) drawn in my deception, and (2) kept in by mind control.

For example, when a person is given an introductory lecture on TM, is s/he told that if they learn TM, in a few years, they might be celibate, meditate  6 hours a day, spend thousands of dollars on astrology and Vedic rituals, wear beige or scarlet, eat a lacto-vegetarian diet, buy an expensive new house, and be convinced that if they don't do their daily TM program, will be personally responsible for World War III?  

Are they told that on relaxing residential retreats, the extra meditations will put them in a state of reduced critical thinking, where they will absorb quasi-Hindu doctrine?  And that in this state of cognitive vulnerability, they will be told that (sub-standard) research "proves" that TM is the solution to all human problems?         

My suggestion to the reader is to learn more about new religions and also more about destructive cults, and then decide for him/herself what they think TM is.  (It could be both!)  There are other models on what constitutes a destructive cult beside the 2-point one I've reviewed here.  I recommend googling Margaret Singer Ph.D., and Robert J. Lifton, M.D, and Steve Hassan, M.Ed's website as noted above, for other useful models.  Also you could look at websites listed on the right hand side of the TM-Free homepage for a start.

Thank you to all commenters for your many, many intelligent and insightful comments.  Also thanks to all who read TM-Free but do not send comments.  

If any other reader would like their comments placed in this position of prominence as a TM-Free Blog "post," please let us know, and we will try to oblige!

Emotional Problems Post-TM; Relating to Fairfield Relatives, Part I

Recently I saw two readers' comments on TM-Free Blog that caught my attention in that I thought they lent themselves to serious discussion.  

The first one mentioned psychological problems the reader has had since leaving the TM movement.  

The second one asked how others manage the tricky terrain of visiting true-believer TM relatives and friends who live in Fairfield and Maharishi Vedic City, Iowa.

I was surprised that no one responded to these two comments.  Since some TM-Free readers read only the essays, but not the reader comments, I suspect this may have been what happened, and these two topics slipped through the cracks.      

So I hope I have not overstepped these two readers' privacy by reprinting portions of their comments below:

First Topic:  Emotional Problems Post-TM?

 Reader's comment:   

"...My commitment to TM lasted about 8 years....I did not have any acute psychological trauma as a result of the rounding and the indoctrination, and the recovery, although a bit slow, was not traumatic either. But I sometimes wonder if some of my psychological/ emotional difficulties are related to my years with TMO [TM organization - ed]."

My response:  

It is not uncommon for people who have left high-demand groups and have re-integrated themselves into the non-cult world to find that they have emotional problems.  The problems may not seem connected to the group; therefore it may not occur to them that these problems are a result of their time in the group.  If they see a psychotherapist, the psychotherapist may also agree that the problems are due to pre-existing issues.  (Psychotherapists are only slowly being educated on this new field of post-cult syndrome.)  For example, long ago I told my psychotherapist that I walked around in constant terror that the world was about to blow up.  He interpreted it in the standard psychodynamic way.  That is, he theorized that I must be angry about something from my childhood, and that I was experiencing that anger in a disguised form, as fear of the world exploding.  

Then, I met with Steve Hassan, an exit counselor.  Steve asked me, "What did they tell you would happen if you left TM?"  I replied, "Why...they said that if I left Fairfield, I would be 'personally responsible' for World War Three!"  And as soon as I made the connection, the terror went away!

That's an obvious example, but it illustrates my point.  I recommend Steve Hassan's website freeminds.org, and his books.  I hope these help.        

Second topic:  How to Relate to Fairfield TM Relatives

Reader's comment:

"I’d like to get back to some previous comment threads on how to relate to family in TM if you are not in it....

'...I don’t expect my [relatives] to give up TM, and I don’t even try to convince them much or argue with them. But I do....

[NOTE:  Something's gone wrong with this computer program, so I will continue this article as Emotional Problems Post-TM; Relating to Fairfield Relatives, Part II. - ed.]

Indoctrination is Subtle and Sneaky

At TM-Free we recently received a question from a concerned former TMer. What I found interesting about the email was that its writer is quite savvy about the hypocrisy of the TM organization, and has put a lot of serious research into cult issues. It brought home to me how there's always more to be learned about mind control, how it's all around us, how vulnerable we are to its sneaky tactics, and how we have to keep practicing our critical thinking. It also reminded me that we at TM-Free can serve a role in helping people learn how to deal with people they love who may be involved in a destructive cult.  

IMPORTANT NOTE: We at TM-Free are not professionals counselors in this field. If you are concerned about someone, read and consult professionals such as those listed on the right at our home page. (Note: We do NOT recommend the Cult Awareness Network, since that organization was bought by Scientologists a decade or so ago). 

Here is the question from the reader: I wonder if any of you know anything about the "XYZ" group. A dear relative of mine has gotten into it and swears her "cult radar" is not going off. But I keep seeing things in it that remind me of other groups that use undue influence. She is highly aware of the influence of group think, (emphasis added), having been along for the ride during the T.M. circus years in Switzerland during the 70's....  

Response from various TM-Free editors:  Keep an eye on things.  It doesn't necessarily matter how much she knew about cults ahead of time.  Once the right kind of person is in a trance state, the executive control function of the brain is shut down.  And without the executive control function, any foreknowledge about cults is not being processed or applied to the current situation.  Cult dogma can then be steadily ladled in without the person realizing it's happening.

And afterwards the person still doesn't know it happened, even after being away from the indoctrination experience for awhile.  People can't detect reality shifts; they don't remember what reality was like before the indoctrination.

Of course everything depends on how much "the right sort of person" she is.  Maybe she's not.

If you research nothing else, please watch this amazing YouTube for a demonstration of surreptitious induction of dissociation, and of exploiting it to change people's beliefs in under 5 minutes:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dzn9rX7rauA 

This is an extraordinary demonstration of how easy it is to get people under your thumb, of how to be a cult leader.

Do look up the group in some of the websites listed on the right.  Also, here are some questions that might help you determine if she's unknowingly come under their influence:  Does she seem evangelical about the group?  Defensive about criticism of it?  Questioning of it?  How much does she say her life was "transformed"?  Is she keen to go back for more?  Is she keen to get you to go?

I can understand you wanting to keep at arm's length from the group, but it I were you I'd start asking her to share what she had learned from the experience, and what growth she felt she had achieved from it.  For one thing, you might get a better idea of where her head is at regarding it.  And if there are current or potential problems, you're better off establishing that she can share things with you, thus keeping the line of communication open.  

If she starts sliding down the slope into full-scale cult involvement, you want her to share the ride with you as much as possible.  You would then be an open connection to reality.  The reason that you want to back off if she gets defensive is to avoid triggering a cognitive dissonance response.  If she gets defensive, then don't be critical about the group, or she might disconnect as far as sharing about it goes:

http://goo.gl/MWaj 

which would shut down communication.

Or of course everything might be just fine with her.  It still wouldn't do any harm to open a dialogue about it with her.  Just be interested, curious and respectful when asking, not critical, to see how things lie.

The "cult leader" in the video mentioned above is Derren Brown.  Brown is a master of a classic branch of stage magic called "Mentalism."  You can find many excerpts from his performances on YouTube.  A "mentalist" is a performer who simulates having supernatural powers, but who is honest that it is all a fake.  A mentalist uses mental acuity, cold reading, warm reading, hot reading, principles of stage magic, hypnosis and/or suggestion to present the illusion of mind reading, psychokinesis, extra-sensory perception, precognition, clairvoyance or mind control.

In other words, a mentalist uses the exact same techniques that a cult leader uses.  The only difference is that the mentalist is honest about it all being an act.

(Thanks to Wikipedia and www.suggestibility.org for selected quotes).

Boston-Area Cult Recovery Group Starts Jan. 26, 2013

I want to share with our readers this email that I recently received from the International Cultic Studies Association (ICSA):

"ICSA will soon begin two-hour meetings in the Boston area.  The meetings will take place at MeadowHaven, a residential facility for former group members that is located about 25 miles south of Boston.  The meetings will be directed by MeadowHaven's founders, Robert Pardon and Judy Pardon.  The meetings will be educational yet supportive.  The plan is to explore a particular topic, e.g., resolving trauma, recovering from an aberrational Christian group, for 8 meetings, and then to explore another topic.  Former members of any high-control or cultic group are welcome.  Through these meetings, participants can acquire conceptual tools to help them understand troubling issues, get to know others wrestling with similar problems, improve communication skills, and facilitate healing.  An introductory meeting will take place at MeadowHaven on January 26, 2013 (Saturday) from 9:00 A.M. to 11:00 A.M.  (URL for directions:  http://www.meadowhaven.org/place.html).  At this meeting, participants can discuss possible topic areas that the first series of meetings can cover and decide on dates and times for subsequent meetings.

Although this first group is designed for former group members, ICSA also hopes to provide supportive groups for family members in the Boston area, if there is sufficient demand.  If you are interested in attending the former member group or in starting a family group, please e-mail ICSA at: mail@icsamail.com.

Please tell others who might be interested in these meetings, especially if you think they are not on our mailing list."

Maharishi Mahesh Demeans Children

An adult who was raised under Maharishi's supposedly enlightened umbrella shared the following excerpt from one of the founding books about Maharishi and Transcendental Meditation. Do read the comments from other TM-kids which followed this facebook posting.

Kind of long story but interesting for all of us TM'ers, the children seem to be the only ones that can recognize the emperor with no clothes. Excerpted from "Maharishi at '433' By Helena Olson", the 1979 republication of Helena Olson's 1967 "A Hermit In the House", about her family's houseguest experience with our dhoti-clad guru when he came to the United States :

Theresa had not yet seen Maharishi, and as he alighted from the car she started to run toward him. His eyes met hers and both smiled as he commenced a slow, regal walk to our steps. Roland joined us to greet him. Theresa and I presented him the white geraniums.

"Nice," he said.

"Come in," said Roland who escorted him to the sheet draped armchair. He sat in it in the cross legged position. Tina came in to meet him, and, as I expected, talked to him casually and easily as we all wished to do. I enjoyed just looking at him. We offered punch. He declined and asked for water. Tina and Theresa served him. Then we invited him to see the house. The Siamese cats, Su-Ling and Mei-Ling, came with him from the living room into the small library. Turning into the study, he lingered a moment, then proceeded down the hall to view the dining room, saying nothing. He nodded quite often to the little retinue following. We were hoping he liked it. When we came to the stairs, Roland asked Maharishi if he would like to see the room we had prepared for him. He nodded, and we went upstairs. The two cats raced ahead. The front bedroom was large and airy with windows on two sides. Naturally, it was a little on the dainty side, as it had been decorated for our two oldest daughters while they were home. He stood only at the door. As we went down the small hall to point out the bath, he stood silently. Then he said, "What is there?" motioning to a separate wing of the house. "Oh, Maharishi," I laughed, "that is Tina's room." I nodded toward her, and was a little surprised to see a slight frown on her face. "Even we rarely go in there," I started to say. "I see it?" came the reply. I felt trapped. Every large home and family has a room that gets its door closed when company comes. This room was like that most of the time! We felt Tina's need to be free, and we put as little restriction on her as possible. Her room was completely her private kingdom. Only Sun-Ling, Tina's special favorite cat, came and went freely. Although she had spent the morning cleaning her domain, I had great hesitancy in opening the door. She had always said,"I can't relax when things are too neat."

At this fateful moment we stood in front of the closed door anticipating the worst. I caught Tina's eye as she stood there watching adults invade her world. I wanted to leave the door closed but had to take hold of the knob and open it. Tina's life was to change too. I heard a deep gasp come from Maharishi as he stepped back. Every inch of the walls not adorned with doll collections was covered with souvenirs from school proms, menus, pom-poms from ball games, a toreador poster, ballet posters, movie star pictures, a cow bell and other props from the theatre. But the bed was made, and all clothing was put away. Maharishi's eyes took in the whole collection, and came to rest on the four large windows framed with trees and tropical vines. The curtains blowing free in the afternoon breeze gave a well decorated room an air of seclusion and a suggestion of simplicity. "If you would like to stay in here, we can take some things off the walls."

"That would be very nice."

I thought everything was fine until, out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of Tina's face. I shut my eyes quickly and ushered the group downstairs to safer ground. After the family was once again alone, I took Tina in my arms. She was near tears. "If that man is so holy, he understands how I feel about my room! Nobody can have my bedroom! Why can't he use the front bedroom?" Her eyes glowed like fiery coals. "I wish he would have, Tina. But, for some reason, he liked your room. I think it is quite an honor."

Tina was not convinced.

Olson, Helena, Maharishi at '433': The Story of Maharishi Mahesh Yogi's First Visit to the United States (Los Angeles: R. R. Donnelley, 1979). 40-42.

Facebook Comments on the post   :


E what an asshole! 

M Wow Tina got screwed over twice; once by her mom who didn't protect her privacy/property and again by the strange man in white robes.

M Yah, and then didnt Tina go and built a house at HM?

L She did, I met her with her attorney husband can't remember his name? She seemed pretty out of it to me:(.

M Peter and Tina Sterling... I guess Tina had housing karma with Mahesh her whole life! Zoinks! ;-))

L I still have my house in Boone!! Keep hoping someone from the new cult will buy it(sri sri whatever)

P Lol. If Tina didn't want to give up her bedroom then it's because she was just unstressing. An enlightened master never makes mistakes - it was good for her evolution to give up her bedroom. She just wasn't evolved enough to understand.

M Learned you can't help anyone..but they can see your story and learn for themselves ...when they want to wake up, they will on their own timing, but many are way too invested to ever do so.

K There is an old saying "Take the best and leave the rest". I personally know Tina and Peter, and I'm sure she is neither "out of it" or feels deprived from Maharishi choosing her bedroom. But here's the question I have for L and M: Which is more important to you- How Tina feels today, or your opinion about what happened in the story above. If you are acting out of compassion for Tina, then I'm sure she would love to talk with you about the experience (she and Peter do have a telephone). But if you are more interested in trying to find and spread negative stories about Maharishi (or anyone else) then I'm sure you will find an eager audience. Some people are always more interested in dirt.

N HI K ...naw, nothing is "against" or "for"--- I think they are a lovely couple. Just find it interesting that she has housing karma with Mahesh..;-)) First her bedroom gets swiped then she builds a million dollar mansion where Mahesh tells everyone to build, then he pulls out of the development...interesting karma is all! Blessings upon you.

F Yeah sorry K   I'm from Australia and know none of the people involved, but i was raised in the tm movement. Its not a matter of enjoying the act of digging up dirt. I was deprived of many things due to the TM movement, and I never even stood in his presence. It's just a reality. The man was a parasite.

M I know a man here in M--- whose sister was approached sexually by Mahesh years ago, when they were in TM movement in their 20's. She had been falling in love with a guy her age, while Mahesh made his advances. She and her boyfriend decided to leave the TM group and basically "get out." Mahesh offered them a small private place to fly out on when he heard they were leaving. The plane mysteriously crashed minutes after take off.

My ex husband bought Mahesh's old helicopter (during the time we were not in Mahesh's favor.) the helicopter got shipped to Florida from Holland. Our pilot went down to Florida to fly it to NC, and almost died because it had been jimmied with. The only reason he is alive is because he knew from his time in Israel how to land a copter whose tail rotor had fallen off. 

Our breaks on our vehicles in NC were cut when we returned to get our stuff at our homes.

The guru was not benign lets just say.

M I know that the above is a can of worms for the K’s out there, but what the heck, I want to let people know, what L says is true.

K If those stories are true, I'm sorry you guys had those experiences. But it is sadder that you choose to spend so much time re-living them. Go out and live life. And if you are haunted by these experiences, see a therapist. We all have bad experiences. Some worse than others. But life is for living. Where we put our attention is a choice. And what we dwell on. we become. No offense intended.

M K you are absolutely correct. In addition, the beauty of connecting on FB can be to share and swap stories, both beautiful and painful. While most of my life is now swept up in the throws of very different subject matter, it is amazing to look back up my river and see how the waters shaped the rocks. I imagine for L and others who were raised from birth in the movement that the processing and de- programming may last longer than for myself, and I honor and respect this process, as it is a deep awakening into what feels right to the depth of one's soul. And soul matters are of great importance and value, and worthy of deep reflection. Therefore let us all listen and share our perspectives, as you have, such that we may further each others' path toward understanding.

L My reason for sharing is I don't want anyone to live through what I did and to reveal the monsterous lies that are being taught to children and adults alike. The children are more susceptible in some ways as beliefs become almost intractable if swallowed young. Also, very creative and innocent minds can end up in trouble too. Both of those wonderful qualities in people being used against them I find monsterous!! TMO needs a god dam warning label like any powerful drug!!!

M... Gotta say my evidence is not anecdotal -- I lived it. 

I can even give names on the stories of others, but prefer to respect others' privacy.

Bottom line is, I am not a part of any TM bashing group, and actually do not regularly spend my energy in this way, but I see many still are hopping out of the hot water cauldron, and if I can cheer them on, I certainly will..:-))

For those that choose to keep swimming in the hot water, god bless, cause it must still feel good and that's an authentic choice as well.

L’s thread does peak my interest, and while I've held my tongue for a decade or so, I find it quite fun to make fun of my own past and my own gullibility, I totally cannot believe what I believed, I suppose..:-))

Side note: beyond the attempts on our lives and our finances from Mahesh, I'd say the saddest part was hearing Mahesh yell at D  on the phone abusively. That sure the hell is not anecdotal -- I was there listening. No one deserves that, for choosing to have a child and get married. Or being in Vlodrop and experiencing being "excommunicated" in that environment ... That sure the hell isn't anecdotal either. And at the time none of those abuses were even very funny. Just saying'

M yeah ... well anyhow let's all just say, a certain chord has been struck with L's post, cause this is a long thread and probably the most and longest I have ever commented on FB to anyone's anything...love to you all, and now I'd better get back to that thing I call the present most immediate life

F Wow!! I accept that everyone here approaches the subject from a different angle, but I am going to try to nut this out. We're are talking about a powerful group of people with a massive following and it's not just America and India. We're talking about wave after wave of children being born into a non-reality where all sorts of abuses take place, including sexual, physical, spiritual, emotional, ritual and mental abuse. If it weren't for those people who continue to make information available on the internet, whether they repeat themselves or not, I would have never even made contact with another single ex-TMer. The most important thing here is children. And if we were to shift our focus away from a problem which continues to destroy lives before they even begin, that would be highly negligent. And yes K, I see a therapist. Have seen one for more than half of my life. You cant tell a quadraplegic to get up and walk, in the same way you can't tell a survivor of childhood trauma to just move on with life. There are many handicaps.

L Thank you for that wonderful perspective. You left out "At that time he probably wasn't enlightened yet, there are many stories of him reading people's minds, he just couldn't with Tina." My response "He was trying to exert authority and establish who was in control of the house and he was probably pissed she talked with him like he was just a normal dude." LOL 

Recovering from Transcendental Meditation, part 2012

For many, recovering from TM takes a lifetime.  So if you're still recovering after many decades, don't lose hope, and don't berate yourself.  It's normal.

I hope that some day there will be better techniques available to help people recover more quickly.  Right now, the best advice is to learn about mind control.  Other things that help are:  conversations with other former members, physical exercise, practicing real-life skills that you lost (or never learned if you were raised in a cult), psychotherapy, residential recovery centers, continued reading about destructive cults.  One exit counsellor suggested writing down every single thing you remember from your time in the destructive cult.

Gina (a co-contributor to this blog - see panel on the right) published a post on this blog, ("Psychotherapy with Former Cult Members" posted September 2, 2011;  http://tmfree.blogspot.com/2011/09/psychotherapy-with-former-cult-members.html), in which she informed the readers of a new Continuing Education Units course for psychotherapists.  I was moved to send the following e-mail to the teacher of this course, as follows:

From:  Laurie ------    

Date:  June 14, 2012 

To:  Patrick O'Reilly  

Subject:  Recovery for former destructive cult members

Dear Dr. O'Reilly:  

I am a friend of Gina Catena's, and like her, I am in recovery from the Transcendental Meditation (TM) organization. 

She showed me your excellent internet article on how therapists can help former cult members by encouraging them to learn about mind control.  I am grateful that you are putting the information about mind control and post-cult syndrome (which can masquerade as other mental health conditions) out there, and are offering a CEU course.

Since the psychological community is still at the beginning stages of learning how to help former destructive cult members, and since you are a leader in educating therapists on how to help cult victims, I hope it will be helpful for you if I share three additional steps that I had to go through in order to help me recover from my cult.

1.  I needed to learn information about my particular group - the specific lies that my particular group taught which kept me a believer.  Even though I already understood mind control, I still was a believer because of the 600 research studies I had been taught about, which proported to prove how marvelous TM was for every aspect of every person's life.  I had to read anti-TM websites to discover that TM experiments were usually biasedly designed and/or biasedly conducted in order to produce only positive results.  Also, I learned that some research had shown that TM sometimes produces unimpressive or harmful results, but that the TM organization had kept that information from us.

2.  I needed to talk to other former TMers who had been at my level of involvement in TM.  Even though I had spent over 20 years telling my TM experiences to sympathetic friends, therapists, and former TMers who had been at lower levels of TM involvement than I, TM memories continued to flood my mind.  However, when I finally found peers, and told them my memories, the memories finally stopped.  

3.  I have been in psychotherapy for many years.  By working on family-of-origin issues, TM has less and less hold over me.  

If these additional steps were necessary for me, then I assume there must be others out there who also need more than just education about mind control in order to recover from their destructive cult.

I hope this information is helpful to you.  Please feel free to contact me if I can be of assistance to you.

Please keep up the good work!  Thank you for what you are doing! 

Sincerely,

Laurie --------" 

I have been out of TM for 31 years, and I am still recovering.  As Sudarsha, a co-moderator for this site, has said, "You have to claw yourself out of the TM mindset, ('Maheshism') inch by inch."  For instance, it was only last month that I realized that part of the reason I eat a lot of nuts on my morning cereal is because Mahesh said that nuts were very good for you.

A problem I still have 31 years after leaving TM is my difficulty in learning new skills from books.  Before I got into TM, I had taught myself guitar, typing, shorthand and crocheting from books. But since leaving TM, I find it excruciatingly hard to learn new things from books, , like how to use a  computer or follow a recipe.  I think this is because when I try to learn something new, it activates the feelings I had when I was learning to "fly:"  "If you're don't 'fly' twice a day, you're wasting your life."

What stratagems have been helpful in your recovery from TM-brain?  In what areas are you still recovering?

More Thoughts on Recovering from Transcendental Meditation

Here are a few questions that I thought were interesting to ponder. I have written my own answers below. I invite you to think about your own experiences, and if you'd like, to share your stories. Anonymous replies are fine!

1. Did you experience problems due to TM? If so, what were they?

After I left TM, I experienced extreme anxiety and depression. I also had "floating" episodes, where I reverted to believing the entire panoply of TM beliefs.

2. What helped you heal?

Learning about "mind control" and how it worked helped a lot. I did lots of reading. Discovering how easy it is to induce an altered state of reduced critical thinking in someone was pivotal.

Also, for many years I attended a monthly support group for former cult members. This was extremely helpful. Also, I attended a few cult recovery conferences.

Two linchpins that continued to keep my anxiety, depression and floating alive even after 20 years of working to recover from TM were (1) the belief that I was making a serious mistake by not doing TM, and (2) my belief that Maharishi was superhuman and therefore should be followed. When I discovered the internet, I read anti-TM websites. There I learned that researchers had lied about the benefits of TM, and that people who knew Maharishi on a personal level reported what a flawed human being he was. These two pieces of information broke the grip of belief. It was stuff I couldn't have learned no matter how much I read about mind control.

Also, for years I had been looking for other former TM teachers to compare notes with. Finding TM-Free Blog was a blessing for me. When I finally had other former TMers to share my stories with, I ceased obsessively carrying them around in my head, and my TM beliefs finally left.

Psychotherapy was extremely helpful in providing support and grounding and helping my general mood and life issues, but only somewhat helpful around the TM stuff.

3. What didn't help you heal?

I got voluntary exit counseling about 10 years after leaving TM, but it really didn't help much. Perhaps that was because I had already learned most of the stuff they were telling me, mostly about mind control, I think.

4.What well-meaning advice did people give you that did not help you heal?

At one of the cult-recovery conferences I attended, we had a panel of priests, ministers and rabbis who tried to answer our questions about spirituality. One of the panelists started waxing euphoric about how humans are by nature spiritual, and how God loves us. I shuffled restlessly and started dissociating as I was lectured at. Fortunately I wasn't the only one. One former cult member interrupted him and said, "This isn't helpful to us. We were spiritually fucked by these organizations. Some of us were physically fucked too. It is not helpful for us to have to sit through you lecturing us about this." She did go on to explain, (correctly I believe,) that after leaving a cult, a person is best off avoiding religion for a few years, until they are capable of not "floating," and ended by saying, "If there really is a God out there who is all-knowing and all-compassionate, then He knows what I've gone through, and He isn't going to be offended if I keep away from religion for as many years as it takes for me to heal."

Another well-meaning person, a minister-in-training whom I met at a Unitarian-Universalist retreat (i.e. she should have known better, in my opinion) listened to my agonized story of my flashbacks, anxiety, depression, confusion, etc. and wrote me a letter about the value of forgiveness and of letting go, and how "holding on" and not learning from one's mistakes keeps one from moving on. I think she was upset by my still being in so much pain after 9 years. I felt judged, criticized, and not understood. I wrote her back explaining that mind control is not a matter of "will" but a physical change in the brain, and that so long as I was still suffering emotionally, and could barely think straight due to brainwashing, it was physically impossible to "forgive" and "put it behind me."

5. Have you ever successfully helped someone heal from their experiences with TM (or from some other group?) What specifically did you do that helped them?

About 5 year after I left TM, I went to a restaurant for dinner with my sister's ex-boyfriend. She and he had been involved in TM together, and we met in order to discuss (i.e., criticize) TM. A woman at the next table came over and introduced herself as a Sidha, and said that she couldn't help overhearing our conversation. I panicked, expecting to be criticized and to start floating, but she soon made clear that she was very unhappy with TM, and was desperately seeking outside support, and a way to get out of TM. We invited her to sit and talk with us, and exchanged phone numbers, and she ended up attending the former cult member support group that I attended.

The former cult member support group had people who had left all sorts of cults, not just TM. One cult I learned about at the group was the Boston Church of Christ. (Not to be confused with the United Church of Christ or the Church of Christ, which are non-cult Protestant denominations.) Soon after, I attended a party, where I met someone who told me that he was starting to get involved with the Boston Church of Christ and "needed to make a soul-impacting decision very soon." It was an easy intervention for me, because he wasn't thoroughly "in"/brainwashed yet. I told him that I knew some people who had been in the BCC, and had left, and had come to realize that it was a destructive cult. I suggested that before he give his life to that church, that he have a chance to hear the other side of the story, and then he could make a more informed decision. He agreed, so I put him in touch with a few former BCC'ers. I am happy to say that after talking with them, he decided the BCC was a destructive organization, and didn't join.

6. Have you ever seriously tried and failed to get someone out of TM (or some other group)? What did you do? What happened? What advice would you give to someone in this position?

I've never had this experience. Lucky me.

7. Anything else you'd like to share from your experiences?

You are all brave and courageous and have all survived a lot! I tip my hat to you all! Please feel free share your thoughts and experiences below, if you'd like.

Kingdom of the Cults: Transcendental Meditation

Wide Eye Cinema presents an online semi-sensationalistic expose' film about Transcendental Meditation, from a fundamentalist Christian perspective.

The film clearly details the TM Movement's deceptive sales pitch, the Hinduesque nature of TM's teachings and lifestyles, and the pseudo-science.

These filmmakers are additionally concerned that TM would lure TM followers away from Bibilical teachings, and from walking with the Lord Jesus as savior.

The film includes interviews with a faculty member from Maharishi International University (now called Maharishi University of Management), and a Baptist minister who claims to be an "expert on Transcendental Meditation."

The MIU faculty member presents the case for the "structure and integration of knowledge and consciousness", through the "Unified Field", using TM's elaborate "scientific" charts. The faculty member appears as a brainwashed drone with his standard, calm, presentation of memorized statements - statements that we were all taught to say.

The Baptist Minister states that TM is an "evil cult which opens one for demonic influences."

One local interviewee articulately describes his experience of TM, the pull of the TM movement and the ensuing destructive family dynamics. He also explains how his wife, after quitting TM, had the common experience of the mantra continuing to come into her mind against her wishes. This interviewee finally felt free of TM when he accepted the Lord as his savior.

You may view the film here, about one hour long : Kingdom of the Cults: Transcendental Meditation

(personal note: listening to MIU's faculty presentation, I find it embarrassing that I'd ever partially believed the TM fantasy, even though I was raised within "The Movement" and had refused to attend MIU or TTC.)

"Larry King Live!" July 31st interviews Juliana Buhring of 'Children of God'/ 'The Family'

Keep your eyes peeled for "Larry King Live" on July 31st! (I hope Larry King doesn't change the program's date)

Juliana is young, beautiful, intelligent and a dynamic speaker! This interview undoubtedly will be wrenching and enlightening for American viewers!

Her memoir with her sisters "Not Without My Sister" was a 2007 & 2008 bestseller in UK and Australia; their publisher, Harper Collins, did not promote the book well in the USA.

Juliana and her siblings were raised around the world in the cult 'Children of God'/'The Family', the ultimate Bible-based free love group, which included ample 'sharing love' with everyone including children, i.e. pedophilia as religious practice.

The 'Children of God' organization now officially denies these teachings. Their leadership remains in hiding.

Juliana unrelentingly publicizes damage wrought to children raised within destructive groups, and works to create international codes for child protection, including removal of statutes of limitations which protect perpetrators.

Juliana is driven by concern for her younger siblings still within the group, and for others who live with crippling psychosis or who've needlessly died.

You won't want to miss this one!

Juliana's engaging, heartfelt stories, matter of fact humor, and poise are a testament to the resiliency of the human spirit.

Transcendental M & Ms

TM Mortalities and Morbidities

In the medical world we have monthly M&M meetings to discuss cases or 'negative outcomes.' These M&M meetings help to improve practice management. This is standard practice, regardless of the deemed cause of injury or death.

Those who spent years deeply involved with the TM Movement know individuals, or heard stories of those, who experienced severe problems. Most of us did not have severe problems, other than adapting to normal society after cult/Movement life.

In the interest of discussing risks and extent of cult-related problems, we were recently asked, “Does anyone know how many TM-related deaths there are?” Of course, an official tally does not exist. The TM-Movement would never track this.

Many of us know folks who passed away due to medical neglect because they chose intensive AyurVed treatments or yagyas (costly prayer rituals) while avoiding efficacious medical treatments until too late. Others committed suicide. Some confused youth passed away due to drug overdose. Some youth were victimized by sexual predators. Some individuals experienced psychotic breaks on prolonged rounding courses.
Naturally, the causes were attributed to individual weakness or "unstressing"

In the interest of having some data, Sudarsha offered to keep a list. This list will NOT be made public, but at least there could be a discussion about documented TM-related mortalities and morbidities.

We are not arranging this for legal action, only to have an idea of case histories.
Again, this list would remain confidential in Sudarsha’s possession.

If you know of anyone directly (not just rumor) who passed away due to a TMO-related reason, or went psychotic while on prolonged TM program, or other chronic medical problems (neglected medical care in favor of AyurVed), please jot a quick email to Sudarsha.

The list has begun.

We will repost this request periodicly.

Please provide Sudarsha with:

* Name *year of death or psychotic break *adult or child/youth (if minor, then age) *city *official cause of death or incident.

You could send this to Sudarsha at:

sudarshaisnamaskar@gmail.com

Thank you for kindly sharing your knowledge of these tragic histories.

In memory of loved ones lost or damaged.

Denial Makes the World Go Round

An interesting article about the dual purpose that denial serves for human coping.

Many of us crossed the line to detrimental denial in justifying continued Movement involvement, or avoiding facing it full-on after departure. Enjoy!

Denial makes the world go round.

Calling a spade a spade may be painful, but it's the only way to wake up and recover.

If it walks like a cult, quacks like a cult, acts like a cult, and looks like a cult.. well then...

The Raja speaks : It's your fault/obligation. Please come!

Invincible America

For Information and to apply to the course: www.InvincibleAmerica.org

Please Read Immediately

OPEN LETTER FROM DR. JOHN HAGELIN
TO AMERICA'S YOGIC FLYERS

September 24, 2007

Dear Fellow Governors and Sidhas:

I had the great honor of announcing in July to Maharishi and the world press the results of the first year of our Invincible America Assembly.

The news was excellent-and exactly what we had predicted one year earlier: a record-breaking stock market and a surprisingly robust economy; mounting bipartisan support for a peaceful resolution of the Iraq conflict; improved relations with North Korea, including an unexpected treaty; and fewer natural disasters (in fact, no hurricanes hit the US mainland in over a year-defying the predictions of every respected meteorologist in the country!).

The cause of such extraordinarily good news is an established scientific fact: nearly 1800 Yogic Flyers assembled together in groups in Maharishi University of Management and Maharishi Vedic City-enough to create a high degree of coherent national consciousness-the basis for a healthy, peaceful, prosperous, invincible nation.

But now, two months later, it's a different story. The market has turned volatile, peace efforts in Iraq have stalled, and US-Iran relations are flaring up again.

Why? There are now up to 200 fewer Yogic Flyers in the flying halls.

I write to every Yogic Flyer in America to give a gentle but urgent call: Please come here and fly together in a large group! We must immediately bring our numbers up again above the super radiance threshold of 1730. And ideally, we must increase those numbers to 2000 and beyond!

Yes, it is true that more Vedic Pandits are on their way from India and should be here in a few months. And their arrival will certainly raise our numbers.

But the Vedic Pandits should come here to "crown the nation with invincibility"-not to lay the groundwork. Creating national coherence is the responsibility of all American Yogic Flyers-including all of us who are blessed to be living in this sublime community.

Please come. You will hasten the rise of your own supreme enlightenment and enjoy life in a state of perpetual bliss consciousness. And you will radiate your bliss to America and the world.

Thank you so much.

Jai Guru Dev

John

Transcendental M & Ms

TM Mortalities and Morbidities

In the medical world, we have monthly M&M meetings, to discuss cases of 'negative outcomes.' These M&M meetings help us identify ways in which we can improve our medical management. This is standard practice, regardless of the deemed cause of injury or death.

Those who spent years deeply involved with the TM Movement know individuals, or heard stories of those, who experienced severe problems. Most of us did not have severe problems, other than adapting to normal society after the Movement experience.

In the interest of discussing risks and extent of cult-related problems, we were recently asked, “Does anyone know how many TM-related deaths there are?” Of course, an official tally does not exist.

Many of us know folks who passed away due to medical neglect because they chose intensive AyurVed treatments while avoiding efficacious medical treatments until too late, others committed suicide, while some confused youth passed away due to drug overdose; some experienced psychotic breaks on various prolonged rounding courses.
Naturally, the causes were always attributed to individual weakness.

In the interest of having some kind of data, Sudarsha offered to keep a list. This list will NOT be made public, but at least there could be an answer to the question about number of documented TM-related mortalities.
Sudarsha requested that we also list those who went psychotic or had other chronic apparently-TM-related disability.

We are not arranging this for legal action, only to have an idea of numbers.
Again, this list would remain confidential in Sudarsha’s possession.

If you know of anyone directly (not just rumor) who passed away due to a TMO-related reason, or went psychotic while on prolonged TM program, or other chronic medical problems (neglected medical care in favor of AyurVed), please jot a quick email to Sudarsha.

The list has begun.

We will repost this request on a monthly basis.

Please provide Sudarsha with:

* Name *year of death or psychotic break *adult or child/youth (if minor, then age) *city *official cause of death

You could send this to Sudarsha at:

sudarshaisnamaskar@gmail.com

Thank you for kindly sharing your knowledge of these tragic histories.

In memory of loved ones lost or damaged.

Memory Lane!

Group dynamics w/ the Beatles. Including shots of Mike Love, Mia Farrow, Donovan.
Everyone singing, loving, happy, the higher purpose. We believed the good.

It was the best, in many ways! Hitler Youth Camps used the same methods.
For the children and the idealistic it felt great! (for a while)
The group bonding methods work.


The Beatles in India - singing the teachings.


(in Italian) The Beatles in India Part 1.


(in Italian) The Beatles in India Part 2.

After the fact opinions:


Sexy Sadie (M's family surname is Shrivastara)

Lifton's Criteria of Thought Reform applied to TM. Parts Six and Seven of Eight

by Gina Catena, M.S.

This is a continuation of an essay series. This blogpost addresses how Lifton's sixth and seventh criteria of thought reform apply to the Transcendental Mediation program.

You may begin Part One of this series by clicking here.


LOADING THE LANGUAGE

“The language of the totalist environment is characterized by the thought-terminating cliché (thought-stoppers) Repetitiously centered on all-encompassing jargon, The language of non-thought. Words are given new meanings -- the outside world does not use the words or phrases in the same way -- it becomes a "group" word or phrase.” (1)

Loaded language isolates a person from meaningful communication with others who do use words in the same way. The classic TM thought-stopping cliché is the attribution of any sadness or anxiety to “unstressing.” A person will discredit discomfort or doubts by believing they are “unstressing.”

Another thought stopping cliché is taught during the TM-checking procedure “if you experience any roughness, pay it no mind and gently return awareness to the mantra.” In that one sentence, TM teachings acknowledge that some individuals may experience anxiety or "roughness" in response to this meditation practice, and simultaneously denies the validity of inner conflict by directing a person to return to their hypnotic mantra-repitition. Many currently practicing TMers, and former TMers, say they automaticly return to the mantra, even involuntarily, during times of stress.

Other altered terms are common to TM-speak such as gaining "Spontaneous Support of the Laws of Nature" when things fall into place in one's life solely because they meditate. “Bliss” refers to experiencing the “transcendent” or the source of all thought within ourselves. The physics term “Unified Field” refers alternately to “transcendental consciousness,” “God,” “Being,” or “the Absolute.” “Ignorance” refers to that state of not having learned TM, such as that of any outsider. "Group concsiousness" or "coherence" refers to the power of the group process. More specific Vedic-derived terms apply to minutiae of lifestyle guidelines for diet, dress, architecture, food supplements, music, astrology and gemstone therapies.

Upon leaving the TM community, I struggled to integrate into my present community (family suburbia). It was difficult to eliminate the loaded language from my thoughts and speech. It was more difficult to extricate TM’s loaded language from my thought processes, than it was to learn two foreign languages. Others raised in the TM movement, but younger than me in age, verify the same experience.

One young woman said, "those thoughts and directions keep coming in my head. They get in the way of everything. It's hard to shake off those inner life cliche's and focus on tasks in front of me. Some things are good, but others just prevent me from thinking properly. And that mantra! It still keeps coming in my head. What the f**k is THAT about? I just want it to go away!"

DOCTRINE OVER PERSON

“Every issue in one's life can be reduced to a single set of principles.” (2)

When in the TM mindset, The Science of Creative Intelligence (SCI) and Maharishi Ayur-Ved are the only accepted sources of truth and life principles. Maharishi taught us the 33 lesson course of SCI encompasses all the "Laws of Nature."

“If one questions the beliefs of the group or the leaders of the group, one is made to feel that there is something inherently wrong with them to even question -- it is always "turned around" on them and the questioner/criticizer is questioned rather than the questions answered directly. The underlying assumption is that doctrine/ideology is ultimately more valid, true and real than any aspect of actual human character or human experience and one must subject one's experience to that "truth."(3)

To be truly on the TM path to enlightenment, there is limited acceptable variation of individual thought or expression. Maharishi taught us that doubting (him) could jeopardize our chances to enlightenment. He threatened with, “If you doubt, the doubt will manifest. Never doubt.” We were afraid to question.

The experience of contradiction can be immediately associated with guilt. One is made to feel that doubts are reflections of one's own evil. When doubt arises, conflicts become intense.” (4)

Many who leave the TM organization do not tell old friends, or family members, of their decsions to live outside the TM paradigm after moving away. Current True Believers (TBs) attempt to reconvert us back to TM. The thoughtful person who left the TM program, is deemed misguided at best, and evil at worst. (I am officially a lost cause now!)

Speaking against the TM organization risks losing our loved ones, and being ostracized for ever. Prior posts on this blog, and some comments, express the knee-jerk defensive response that many devout TMers have to our online discussion and analysis. It is sad to read vehement attacks on us here and elsewhere on the internet, in defense of threatened ingrained beliefs. We once also believed that those who spoke against TM were "lost in ignorance," or erroneously directing their "unstressing." We thought, "If only they would meditate again, their anxiety would leave and they would see the light again."

“The pattern of doctrine over person occurs when there is a conflict between what one feels oneself experiencing and what the doctrine or ideology says one should experience.” (5)

Inner conflict between doctrine and personal thinking, as described by Lifton, may be the cause of TM-related psychosis and suicides. Since most of those who committed suicide did not leave notes behind, we cannot know with certainty.

When inner thoughts conflict with the deemed-to-be-ultimate-truth, one’s community, and everything one loves, an existential crises may ensue. The TM solution to this “experience of intense unstressing” would be to return to meditate and calm oneself. This silences disquieting thoughts by returning to transcendence, or a self induced inner trance.

“Witnessing” in TM refers to the state of observing oneself as if an outsider, ostensibly because one is grounded in the “Absolute” (God) and experiences even their own existence as cosmically inconsequential. The doctrine and inner experience is more important than any individual. The ultimate goal of TM's "transcendence" is "Cosmic Consciousness."

TM teaches that in Cosmic Consciouisness (CC), one observes even themselves as if from the outside, twenty-four hours per day. This constant separation of self is the goal. The individuality leaves and all creation is ultimately connected as one in the highest state of Unity Consciousness (UC). In UC the ultimate dimunition of personhood would be exalted, as individual personhood disappears. Unity Consciousness is the extreme valuation of "doctrine over person," since personal idenity ceases.


The final segment may be read by clicking here.

1) Lifton, R. (1989) Thought Reform and the Psychology of Totalism. Chapel Hill. University of North Carolina Press.
2) ibid Lifton
3) ibid Lifton
4) ibid Lifton
5) ibid Lifton

Mantras Part 4: unstressing, feeling the body and beyond

Mantras Part 1
Mantras Part 2: Some thoughts preliminary to an examination of the mechanics of TM
Mantras Part 3: the makings of the “TM Casualties” or what colour is your cloth becoming?


There is a significant difference between what Mahesh said (“For our practice we select only the suitable mantras of personal Gods.”) and understanding the concept that some things are endowed with spiritual significance. To endow a thing with spiritual or religious significance does not change the thing in any way. What changes is attitude on the part of those who subscribe to the endowment.

Mahesh clearly endowed his actions/teachings and "vision" with spiritual and religious significance and cultured that attitude in us. Remember The Spiritual Regeneration Movement ?

Unstressing

When bizarre behaviour began to erupt at Mallorca, Mahesh called it waves of bliss. He said something good was happening. He didn’t teach that the experience was just another experience and we were to experience the feeling until it resolved itself.

From my side, I see "unstressing" as the body-mind experiencing a crisis, cognitive dissonance in opposition to which it cannot restore its integrity: body and mind feel like they are coming apart and behaviours beyond will-power or aside from what one had previously considered her/his will-power display themselves. I think that many of us accepted Mahesh in toto rather than resolve a crisis.

Feeling the Body

Many of us were there, saw it, even experienced it. The checking notes as they appear on line now (Checking Notes or General Points) give excellent if somewhat inconsistent teaching regarding untoward experiences arising in meditation. But were these "general points" in the checking notes at the time? I would very much appreciate knowing if anyone has the checking notes from Mallorca or prior to Mallorca and could tell me or preferably show me how the understanding of "feeling the body" was taught.

I only remember a conversation with Jerry Jarvis, prior to Mallora. He said that 'it' probably shouldn't be called feeling the body but should be called continuing. At the time, however, this concept seemed a very minor consideration.

I do not ever recall any time when Mahesh explained "feeling the body" as anything integral or as a necessary element to know or practise with as part of long periods of rounding. I can recall no mention of feeling-the-body as a "stitch in time". Regarding the horrendous freak-out that was Mallorca and (to a lesser extent) Fiuggi, apparently very few if any others remembered or knew or thought about this, either.

Beyond

I knew that I was really seeking something.

In a story Ramakrishna* told, he said that the seeker is like a thief in the night, he slips into the darkened house, touches this and that always muttering not the gold, not the gold. But when his hand feels the gold, he knows, he grasps it and is immediately gone into the night.

In some way, I knew I was in the darkened house of ignorance and TM really had the feel of gold. Maybe it might have been just that; but much later I discovered that Mahesh was corrupted by his own greed and narcissism subsequently corrupting not only what he had purloined from his tradition and teacher, but those he taught as well. This is my perception to this day, based upon my interaction with Mahesh and observing his interaction with others.

But just because I had been hoodwinked by a charlatan whose motives I felt were highly suspicious, I did not cease seeking. I kept looking for the gold and now I feel I have found that gold and have been examining it in the broad daylight, questioning practitioners and teachers alike, watching, observing, certainly looking for the behaviours and attitudes with which TM allowed me to be familiar. I am also looking at criteria such as Lifton’s to see if I am being cheated. I wish I could have done this from the beginning with TM.

I have continued the search that began in the spring of 1964. I can only conclude at this time that there is much more to life than TM. There is more than imagining that if you believe something good is happening long enough something good will happen. There is more to life than imagining you have been spiritually endowed by using the suitable mantras for personal gods.

I am a Buddhist presently practicing in the Thai Forest Tradition of Theravada Buddhism. I have no intention of suggesting that this is better than or superior to what Mahesh or Guru Dev is teaching/taught. However, if you are or feel you might be or might have been a TM casualty, you might want to look at “feeling the body” as explained in the Buddhist teachings.

If, and only if after considerable reflection on your part you feel that this is a step, endeavour or exercise you feel confident in making read through The Anapanasati Sutta – A Practical Guide to Mindfulness of Breathing and Tranquil Wisdom and/or The Satipatthana Sutta.

I am suggesting nothing easy. But, if you will, notice that the teaching begins with following the breath and letting mind and body become calm. Do you remember from the checking procedure how, before any mention of mantra, after opening and closing the eyes, you felt some quiet and calm, just naturally?

Did you realize anything or ever think about this?

You already knew how to be calm and quiet. It is my opinion that Mahesh’s teachings beyond establishing this insight is nothing more than a distraction from that calm and quiet, sidestepping the only meaningful reality, your own innate, knowable reality.

How can there possibly be any other basis for happiness in the world than knowing your own specific reality?

Cultivating this calm-and-quiet is the object of the Anapanasati Sutta. The method and teaching above (A Practical Guide) has been extremely helpful for me and I feel that if it is only read as an explanation it is helpful to understand the concept of mindfulness in the Buddhist tradition.

Further, in the The Satipatthana Sutta, we read how the Buddha established mindfulness in four REALITIES, the primary four realities of the individual, the person, YOU.

The first foundation is, basically, feeling the body, getting settled in and comfortable with your own physical reality just as it is. Little by little, as the impediments to mindfulness come up, they are skillfully abandoned.

I want to leave off with the advice of Padmasambhava**, an 8th century CE Tibetan teacher, who summarized his advice on spiritual development like this:

As for the innermost advice: no matter what kind of disturbing emotion you feel, look into the emotion and it tracelessly subsides. The disturbing emotion is thus naturally freed. This is simple to practice.

This is for me the gold and legitimate teachers share this innermost advice but do not sell it.

_____________
* Ramakrishna late 19th Century Indian saint living in the Bengal
** Padmasambhava’s Advice from the Lotus-Born (‘Pointing the Staff at the Old Man’)

Comic Relief

We need some laughter here!

"Many a truth is said in jest"
William Shakespeare

Mind Control Made Easy or How to Become a Cult Leader


TM and Yogic Flying at Pearson College


Yogic Flying Eases Commute


Yogic Flying Birkulator sylee